Is it or isn't it .... and if it isn't, then what is it ......  

Posted by: reflective moments

Damn, went to the dr for an unrelated problem but when I got into the consulting room he asked about my hand so I asked a few questions and he did a test and now is sending me off for a test to eliminate Carpel Tunnel... surely by now they should know what is wrong.  I have had a CT scan, then an Ultra Sound and now need this nerve test thing.  I have got damaged tendons that showed in the Ultra Sound and was told to immobilise my hand and to treat it like it had RSI (never had rsi but gather it means to rest it)  and to stay off the computer ... but, really, I would have expected my hand and wrist to be showing some improvement by now but there is no change ... all this resulting from when I put my hand down to break my fall the week before Christmas and no, I hadn't been drinking, I was on my way to the Christmas party...
My dr was the only one who came out with a bonus as he asked about the book I was reading and is now going to borrow it... (I always take a book with me to the dr as sometimes it can be a long wait).
 hand/wrist doesn't seem to ache any worse than if  I am using it or have it immobilised
and if I put it in a sling then my sore shoulder aches :(

I forgive myself and then I move on...  

Posted by: reflective moments

You can sit there forever, lamenting about how bad you've been, feeling guilty until you die, and not one tiny slice of that guilt will do anything to change a single thing in the past.  So, forgive yourself and move on.... 
  Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass... it's about learning how to dance in the rain.

It's bin night dear!  

Posted by: reflective moments

seeing as you will be away for 9 weeks I would appreciate it if you put the bin out...
no, no, leave my desk where it is I am sure to change things around while you are gone, I know we discussed moving it around but please....
Just take the bin out dear...
no, no, it's okay I can straighten the pantry...
Just take the bin out please...
no, no, I don't want a cup of tea right now....
Just take the bin out dear...
no, no, SnP are fine, they don't need a treat, they have just finished their dinner...
Just take the darn bin out...... please.
Okay, okay, I will stop nagging if you will....
Just take the bin out.....




Oh, is that all you've got.. So you are not really ill.  

Posted by: reflective moments


I was told the other day to buckup it could be worse.... Huh!! 

Diabetes is a chronic disease one that will eventually kill me.  People can be a bit blase about db for one it is a hidden disease and two, because you never read in the obituaries that so and so died of diabetes.  Why is that?  I will answer my own question... it is because when the pancreas is not producing insulin or enough insulin the sugar stays in the blood and travels where the blood does, ie our feet, our eyes, heart, kidneys, liver, our bones... I am sure by now you get my drift.

So when diabetic so and so dies it will say died of a stroke, cancer etc never, that they died of complications from diabetes and yet that is what they died of.  Poor dear diabetic so and so died of complications of diabetes.  So many people are walking time bombs. Undiagnosed diabetics cause a lot of major car accidents by having a stroke or heart attack while driving.  Many truck drivers are diagnosed with db at the autopsy.

So please don't tell me to "buckup" when I refuse that slice of cake you are trying to force on me or that piece of  milk chocolate saying just one piece cannot hurt you surely!! 

Sugar is our enemy whether diabetic or not.  Sugar is making us all fat and the sooner we all realise that sugar is the enemy then the rate of people being diagnosed with diabetes will go down.... so the next time you go grocery shopping, read the total carbs listed on that item..... you will be shocked to see how much hidden sugar you and your family is really eating every day.... 
 

weather the weather is fine or whether the weather is not.....  

Posted by: reflective moments

Scrappy and Pebbles love the beach regardless of the weather


No matter the weather, we would still complain about it .... I would have a little laugh to myself if someone commented on the weather. I always felt you only discussed the weather because you had nothing else to say yet, here I am, discussing the weather.....

 I had to dig out some winter clothes today because it is just so cold for this time of year....
Granted it is the last week of summer, But it still used to be so warm ... I remember when my son was born on the 28th of this month it was stifling hot way into the first few weeks of autumn ...I cannot but feel robbed of a decent summer.  I only feel alive when I feel the sun on my face and limbs....
This summer was spent with Australia either flooding or on fire and with what has been happening in the rest of the world with severe freezing weather I am not looking forward to our winter either....
Where I live it is known to be very cold and even visitors stay away during the winter months.
So why live here?   We moved here because K is from Manchester England and loves the cold... So I gave up my love of sunshine and beaches to move here with him.... But, for the past 5yrs I seem to be the one wintering here while he is somewhere overseas or in the top end of Australia.  all warm locations.... something is wrong with that picture me thinks!  Because his work now is never in this town a compromise is beginning to take shape and maybe in a year we shall move to somewhere less cold in the winter.

a little ditty for Keith  

Posted by: reflective moments

I am making a list and checking it twice
Even emailing K pictures of what I think is nice
I am not wanting much, something small will do
As long as he brings me something from Europe anything will do....

remember when blogging was cool?  

Posted by: reflective moments

Now I feel like I am talking to myself most of the time ...
Even when I click on next blog most are so old or closed.   Oh, well, it is something I am enjoying again with or without anyone commenting because when all is said and done I am doing this for my entertainment :)

Scrappy working on his blog at   

Melancholy  

Posted by: reflective moments

means a feeling of thoughtful sadness....  what a nice way to describe depressed.  works for me.


even this interpretation is better than using the word depressed..... pensive meditation; serious thoughtfulness.

 So why am I interested in such words as melancholy I hear you ask... well, my husband is off at the end of the week for a 9 week working tour of 9 countries that include parts of Europe, Paris, Italy, Switzerland and the Middle East. And I find myself slipping into feelings of deep sadness that as the time for his departure grows near I am finding it increasingly hard not to show how sad I am feeling....

I would love to go with him but, I committed myself to caring for 2 little dogs.... furry members of our family and 9 weeks is just way too long to leave them.  Time enough to travel when my dogs have taught me all they are meant to while they are here with me.

I am glad I wrote this down, it has been cathartic.   Though I am still jealous of him and Cathy's planned visit to the Louvre ..... sometimes it is hard to be the bigger person and not be envious...



OMG Mc Donalds nearly did me in...  

Posted by: reflective moments

Took a 4 hour road trip with K and N today and on the way back stopped at McDonald's for cold drinks it being summer and all here....

N comes back with these frozen ice drinks for her and K and a diet coke for me...
being very thirsty I all but sculled my drink and immediately started feeling squeamish and could barely wait to get home.  Once home I disappeared into the bathroom and when I surfaced I asked K to taste what was left of my "diet coke"  he took a sip, immediately said OMG how could you have drunk that!!  I was very thirsty was my reply and not accustomed to McDonalds thought that was how a premixed drink tasted.   Now poor K also has an upset tummy from the drink.... had to be the drink; we hadn't eaten or drank anything all day, hence the quick stop at McDonalds.   Not a pleasant experience for a diabetic; I have now had to load up on protein to counteract all that sugar... seems it was a "normal" coke I sculled and not a very well mixed one at that.   Next time I will just stick with the water that I always have with me from home.... Just sometimes though it is nice to have a treat...






Into each life a little rain must fall...  

Posted by: reflective moments

Well, time the rain stopped I have had more than my share...
Now, my dr has told me to stop doing repetitive things with my sore hand; like being on the computer... how depressing and, how hard is this going to be.  When I first went to a dr after my fall, I was sent for a CT scan and told it was a sprained wrist which will take as long as a break to heal... Okay, that was a few months ago so, thinking it should be better and it wasn't; I go back to the clinic and see another dr who sends me for an ultra sound.  This shows that I have damaged some ligaments in the hand and now have similar to an RSI injury.   It is the heel of my hand and thumb that were damaged when I had a vertigo attack in the street just before Christmas.... I put my hand down to save my face hitting the gravel, not sure now if  that was a very smart move or not.   Finally, all I can say is thank goodness it is my left hand and that I am right handed....


No, this isn't me but, boy I can sure relate..

Rain, you are spoiling my summer  

Posted by: reflective moments

Got woken up at some ungodly hour of the morning by Scrappy letting me know something was wrong in the kitchen... so out I go to take a look only to find a pool of water in the middle of the floor.  Groaning I am blaming Scrappy and at the same time wondering how on earth did he do such a big ummm splash....  I am thinking he would have had to stand on the kitchen bench when plop!! A big drop of water falls on my head.  Yep, the ceiling is leaking so, not being able to do anything about it at this ungodly hour or in this foul weather I shove a bucket under it and go back to bed.... Scrappy however, was fascinated and every time he heard a drop off he trotted to check it out.  Bearing in mind he sleeps tucked up into my back. Pebbles and K slept right through the action.... In fact, I am still waiting for K to wake up so I can tell him the "good" news.
A leaking roof is not something I need at anytime but particularly not on a Saturday morning....

Disappearing act  

Posted by: reflective moments

I recently was reminded of a time years ago when K and I were out for a walk and I disappeared down a manhole... And to add insult to injury he didn't miss me till he was about 3 houses away and ready to cross the road.   I dropped to my shoulders down the manhole and at the same time lost my voice.... I tried calling to him but no sound came out... by this time he was at the corner and I am watching him and waving my arms. eventually after what seemed like hours, he turned around looking for me and finally he looked down and saw me waving.. what felt like hours had passed was instead minutes.  When Keith got to me he could see that the concrete had broken and crumbled around the cover and as I walked across it the concrete cover spun over and pinned my legs. I was trapped mid stride... I wore those indentations for over a year on my legs, fortunately nothing was broken,  Still to this day I cannot walk over manhole covers....